Comfort in pain

All days are everytime the same.
But I've found confort in the pain.
I try to understand the sadness in my heart.
I try to let this be the beginning of the creation of my new start.
I do think about my mistakes.
I try to make it right, even I don't know what it takes.
Will you forgive me?
Will you give me another opportunity.
Another chance to make this okay again.
This time I will do it differently, this time I have a plan.
How many times did I tell you that...?
And you see where it really takes me, you see how far I get...
Back at your door and what for?
To ask you to take my apology.
To act like there is a whole new me.
All that maddness, all that saddness.
I am sorry that I was the one who caused it.
I am sorry that I was the one who lost it.
Now I have to carry on,
At least try to, now that you are gone.
I see how I am the one to blame and I will carry that burden in shame.
Knowing that everyday I feel comfort, comfort again with my pain.