Acting like we live

I feel the same for years now
And I try to get out of this somehow
But every try turns out to be a mistake
I must be to weak

I can't go on with this pain
Want to jump for a fast train
Becasue the reason to live
Doesn't exist anymore

Maybe it never has exist
But why do I feel like someone has to admit
Say that I can leave now, and everything will be fine
Who's life is this, yours or mine
I can chose for myself
But is there someone who can give me some help

I don't think I must go
But I want to, and want you to know
That if I'm really death
Everything will be better

Every time I open my eyes
No matter how hard I try
I keep seeing everything that makes me want to leave
And nothing is left to believe

If you read this, realise this is real
This story is the way I feel
I'm making signals, and hope for a better life
But how long it's going to take?

I feel like a star burning up
The only thing I want is give it all up
I don't believe in anything anymore
But that we are together that is for sure..