Shell of a man

Have you ever been conflicted
two sides of yourself
and you can't decide
the side that wants to have the same routine
and the side that doesn't

how to decide
what to do
i'm afraid to lose
myself in one of those two

why can't I be both
overthinking will result in
neither
a shell of a man
will remain

and at the end i'll fade away
in the massas that i hate