Gedichten check: Guilt?
I lost my sanity and gave in
God didnâ€™t give me my good spin
This might seem a little dramatic
Was I just being too pragmatic?
Those dark skies grabbing my feet again,
Oh what did I do to my beloved man?
Did I let you down my love?
I was going to watch over you from above,
I apologised for not being stronger,
But for a moment there I couldnâ€™t go on any longer,
Should I feel guilty for what I did to you?
Or should we go on? Just us twoâ€¦
What do I do with this big question mark?
Will I let it give me that much needed spark?
What do I do with this awful crossway?
All I can do is continue to pray
Yes help will be coming I know,
But why is my progress going so slow?
I'm trying my love,
Trying not dying my love,
But how can this be?
If this isnâ€™t really me?
I love you to the moon and back though,
Therefor I will get up and take it slow,
This progress you see is not to be rushed,
They are just my thoughts that need to be hushed,
How can I wrap my head around this now?
I would like to know exactly how,
Yet no one is giving me any clues,
Are my chances actually past due?
Will God forgive me yet again?
For doing this to my beloved man?
I love you dear my love you see,
By your side I will always want to be
Was it you walking with me in that pouring rain?
Was it you who shared my pain?
Yes that was you my beloved man,
From today on, I will do everything I can
To keep you warm and safe my dear,
Conquering my demons and fears,
I will hold your hand in this process,
Together we can make some progress,
Those dark skies pulling my feet,
Will mean nothing when I finally defeat,
What is holding me back for so long,
I have to do this, I have to be strong,
You my beloved man are all I want
Lets continue growing our special bond,
Maybe itâ€™s not God who needs to forgive
Maybe I just need to live
Therefor I forgive myself this mistake,
Letâ€™s go on again for an utter remake,
You and me walking together,
You and me fighting this bad weather,
Succes in my telescope,
But all we have right now is hope,
Letâ€™s put our words in courageous actions,
And create some beautiful fractions,
You and me holding hands in the rain,
Nothing to lose but everything to gain.